What's the Frequency, Bella?
by RogueSyrene
Summary: Bella feels she is doomed to a mundane life with Jake. Her only solace is her writing while listening to her favorite radio DJ. Edward doesn't know where his life is going, settles for a job as a DJ. What happens when he finds out he is Bella's muse?
1. Chapter 1 Song Sung Blues

So I'm reposting Chapter 1 after having Project team Beta look at for me. I can't thank them enough I will be reposting Chapter 2 and Chapter 3 which is already written after getting them looked at.

I own nothing all smeyer.

Chapter 1 Song Sung Blues BPOV

A quick glance at the clock on the bedside table reveals the time. Two in the morning and Jake is snoring like a freight train. I can finally get out of this cursed bed without worrying him, and more importantly, waking him. Squirming out of his unwanted embrace, my skin crawls. My sweatshirt and pants are off in an instant, thrown on the floor and forgotten. The room gets so hot at night, but it's better than having his hands all over my body. Skin-to-skin contact is not of interest to me. The radio is already tuned to my favorite station as I fire up the laptop and lose myself in my own stories of true loves, soul mates, and happily ever afters. Those are the stories that I long to be in, not merely to write about. Unfortunately, my story is already written and the ending isn't happy or sad….it's just there and it's unavoidable.

Wish there was some sad, dramatic story to explain why my life is the way it is, but there isn't. Simply put, I'm a coward, scared of disappointing and hurting the people in my life. What makes it worse is that the more I live my life for those people, the more I hate them. I feel as though there is no one in this world to whom I can turn. I've never been good with people; the only real friend I ever had is Jake, and he's not even that anymore. The problem with Jake…. well, what _isn't_ a problem? Our whole relationship seems to be fucked up beyond repair. All wanted from him was his friendship, but-it was never enough for him. When we crossed the line into something more, he changed. He was no longer easy going. He wanted to know where I was, who I was with, all the time. Deep down I think he knows that I would leave if I could find the courage to do so. To compensate for this, he pushed away all the friends I had made in college. They didn't like the way I acted around him or the way he treated me. I can't blame them; Jake thinks he knows me so well, knows what is best for me. He doesn't know me at all. In his head, he has this perfect picture of me and him together, only I don't know who the girl in the picture is. She has my face, but she's not me; she's who Jake wants me to be. This is why I think I hate him more with each day that passes.

I never had much support from my family. I was always the parent, never the child. My mother Renee is a flake. While she was taking yoga or whatever fucking class was hot at the time, I taught myself to cook and ride a bike. She got remarried when I was eight. Having a child didn't really fit with the lifestyle she wanted to have, so I sent myself to live in Forks with my father, Charlie. Charlie tried his best to be a good dad to me, but he was a police chief first. I don't blame Charlie. He took it hard after my mom left him; he threw himself into his work to combat his loneliness. After so many years of being alone, Charlie was already set in his ways. Fishing on the weekends and working all week, I spend a lot of my time alone or in LaPush on the res with Charlie while he hangs out with Billy, Jake's father. Charlie loves me I know that but he always hinted that Jake would be good for me. Now can't see past his own dream to know how unhappy I am; he just sees what he wants. They are all I have, which only makes me more pathetic and alone.

How did I let things get so complicated with Jake? I don't love him. Never did and never will. He was my best friend, and now I think that I might hate him for the mess we are in now. If only he would have listened to me, things might have turned out differently. It all started off innocently enough. He kissed me, I didn't kiss him back and I thought that should have been enough to stop whatever he wanted to happen between us, but it wasn't. That day haunts me. I often think back to what could have been done differently, what could have been said to stop all this before it started.

Jake and I were enjoying the first bonfire of spring down at First Beach on the La Push res. Jake was acting strange all night, and I had a funny feeling in the pit of my stomach that I wasn't going to like what was about to happen. My suspicions were verified when Jake asked me to walk down the beach to talk in private. Jake kept nervously glancing over his shoulder to make sure that we were far enough away from the rest of the group. Once he determined that we had gone far enough, he grabbed my arm to stop me. Before I knew what was happening, he kissed me hard, shoving his grubby tongue down my throat.

"_Jake don't," _I pleaded while bringing my sleeve up to wipe his slobber off my face.

"_Why not Bell? That was a great kiss. I know you felt it, too." _He was smiling so big, his eyes shining so brightly I hated to break his heart.

"_No, it wasn't. I don't feel like that about you Jake. You. Are. A. Friend. That's it. Please don't make this harder than it has to be." _

"_NO!" _he cried_. "Bella, when are you going to realize that you love me?" _

I felt his lips crush against mine again, his hot breath in my mouth and I tried to pull away. His strong arms kept me from escaping. I went limp in his arms until he finally pulled away he looked me deep in the eyes.

"_See Bella, I told you we are meant to be together," _he said with such conviction.

He was still staring at me with his dark eyes when I finally gathered up a bit of courage, looked him straight in eyes, and told him.

"_No Jake, we aren't. I don't love you." _

He smirked at me and replied while patting me on the head like a little lost puppy.

"_Yes, you do. You'll see. We will be together, forever." _

The next night at supper, Charlie eyed me suspiciously and kept asking me if there was something I wanted to talk to him about.

_"So Bells, how was the bonfire last night? Anything happen of interest?" _He was grinning at me over his plate of steak and potatoes.

_"Ummm. No not really. Just a bonfire. There was fire? And, uh, wood?" _

_"That's not what I heard down at the station today," _Charlie said, smiling bigger than I had ever seen before.

_"Ummm... what did you hear?" _I asked nervously, suddenly not feeling much like eating.

_"Bells, if you want to date Jake, there is no reason to be so nervous. I love that kid like a son. Don't think I could be happier about the two of you. You're finally together, and there is no reason to hide that from your old man." _

No matter how many times I tried to tell him I wasn't dating Jake and that I never would, he just kept saying, _"Oh Bella, give the kid a chance. He's crazy about you." _After a month or two of Billy and Charlie's impromptu setups and Jake's endless phone calls and attempts at "wooing" me, I gave in and agreed to date Jake. Dating Jake seemed to make sense at first. Though I didn't love him, I was comfortable around him, and it would only be a few months until I left for college. It meant a lot to Charlie, too. He was always so worried about me and was happy I would have Jake around to look out for me. So, I figured—what could a few months of dating hurt, right? Wrong. Those few months of dating would change my life forever.

Five years later, and I'm still stuck in a relationship with Jake that I never really wanted any part of to begin with. When it was time to leave for college, I told Jake that a long-distance relationship was just too hard to do and tried to break it off. That summer was very hard to deal with. Jake was constantly telling me that it could work, that he would move anywhere just to be with me. My reprieve came in the fall after school started. I moved and the phone calls started to drop off. I had hoped that he was finally getting the picture and getting over me. I felt so free, no one to worry about but myself. I was doing things I wanted to do. Making new friends from class with similar interests, going out at night… it was all so wonderful. Finally, was able to move on with my life and just be Bella. Until about four months after school started, I came home to find Jake sitting on the steps to my apartment building, suitcase in hand.

"_Jake, what are you doing here?" _

"_I can't take being away from you anymore."_

"_You can't do this Jake. What about school?"_

" _I was able to take some extra classes to graduate early, so here I am. I know we haven't talked much lately, but I have been busting my ass to finish school so we can finally start our life together. You know what they say: absence makes the heart grow fonder. Bella, I realized that I love you so much. I don't know what would happen to me without you." _

He looked at me with those big dopey eyes of his so full of love, and I didn't know what else to do, so I hugged him and invited him in.

Should have told him right then and there that I didn't love him and wanted him to go, but I couldn't bring myself break his heart like that, so I just smiled. Five years later, he's still here and I'm still just smiling. I have tried to get it across to him many times that I don't love him, but no matter how many times I tell him, he won't accept it. Sometimes I wonder if he thinks this is how all relationships are; sure hope not. I don't kiss him unless he kisses me first, and even then I don't kiss back. When he tells me he loves me, I say nothing. I insisted that we have separate rooms, but he always ends up crawling into bed with me. I won't have sex with him no matter what he says or does. I told him I'm saving myself for marriage, yet I make it clear that I'm not ready for a proposal. You would think that all these things would give him a hint, paint a clear picture of how I feel, but they don't. Not to him. As much as I hate him now, I still can't break his or Charlie's heart. I am a coward doomed by the mistakes I've made, silenced by the fear of correcting them.

A/N. Again thanks to Porject Team Beta. I hope this chapter reads better now.


	2. Chapter 2 Enter Sandman

We own nothing at all. All Smeyer, co written with SharonButtah.

**Chapter 2 Enter Sandman**

EPOV

Ah night, so calm and peaceful. Free from the annoying sounds of everyday life, the hum of endless chatter of people all around you. Flipping the switches on the soundboard, I smoothly change from Mozart to Metallica. Glancing at the clock I realize it's already three a.m., only a few hours left on my shift. This job is great I love it. .The hours just seem to fly by. Cueing up the next few songs, I slip on the headphones and lose myself in the music and my thoughts. Lately I've felt as though there is something missing in my life-like I'm a puzzle missing that last piece, and for the life of me I can't figure out what it is. My mother would have me believe it's a career, but I know it's not that. Being a DJ isn't as glamorous as being a doctor or lawyer like she wanted, but it pays the bills. My sister keeps insisting that it is love I'm missing, and maybe it is. Relationships have never been my strong suit. It might be because my parents have what I can only call a perfect marriage. When they look at each other, you can just see them falling more in love. My sister isn't much better; from the second she met her boyfriend she had their life together all planned out. I have never felt that connection with another person. I just assume I was meant to remain alone. Until recently, I've felt that my life was complete.

I really do love my job working the graveyard shift at the local radio station. I'm known as DJ Midnight Sun, a name that was given to me by the station manager my first week on the job, after I had failed to pick something awe-inspiring for myself. Apparently _Edward_ doesn't really provoke visions of a hot radio DJ god in the eyes of my listeners. I hardly think that my listeners care what I'm called, as most people don't listen to the radio this late. Not many people would want to work the graveyard shift. I am the exception. This shift has the advantages of giving me the freedom over the music I play, helping me cater to my unique musical taste. My boss has offered many times to move me to a more popular time slot. I always refuse his offers, as I prefer the solitude of the graveyard shift. After I refused his offer for what must've been the fifth time, he just shook his head, saying "It's just such a shame to be wasting that rich velvet voice." I chuckled when he told me that but refused once again to budge from my spot. While a daytime slot would result in a wage increase, it would also result in more publicity. Publicity is not something I want. I like it that no one really knows who I am. Privacy is very important to my family and me, only those who know me very well know what I do for a living. This job is very easy. It leaves me with a lot of time to explore my other passions in life.

Not that I have anything against hard work, I just feel like I'm at a point in life where I want to sit back and let things happen. Let fate take the driver's seat. I worked hard all through college and was halfway through a law degree when I got bored and switched to medicine. I put in a few years before realizing that wasn't right for me either. The only degree I had enough credit to get was in physiology, and well let's face it, everyone seems to have one. I'm can honestly say that I'm happy with my life overall. I have nice apartment, an easy job, and good friends. What else could I guy want? Well, maybe a girlfriend, but I never have trouble finding someone to release some tension with me when needed.

Looking at the clock again, I see it's just about 4:30 a.m. The morning crew will be here soon. They are an interesting pair, Jasper and Tanya. I've known Jasper since I started here four years ago, and Tanya joined him about a year ago. Jasper is the best friend a guy could ask for. I used to hang out here with him through most of his shift, picking apart his choices in music and mocking his "witty" banter. That stopped when Tanya started. Tanya is a nice enough girl, but the way she looks at me she makes me… well, uncomfortable to say the least. Don't get me wrong-I'm used to girls throwing themselves at me, not that I'm a Greek sex god by any means, but I have been blessed with some good DNA, and I can turn on the charm when needed. Tanya, however, doesn't just throw herself at me, she looks me up and down like I'm something to eat, always whispering in my ear that she's not wearing any panties to work and acting like she owns me. Not that I haven't thought of tapping that..She's hot enough, I guess-strawberry blonde, nice legs, and she would have a decent face if she didn't have her makeup set to "whore" every morning. I guess that why she's on the radio instead of TV, because there is no way she could be on TV without a 1-900 number below her face. Jasper keeps bugging me to just do her already, because he thinks she's in heat. The only reason she stopped making advances on him is because she is dating my little sister, and for someone so small, she can be very intimidating. I remember the day she came in here to confront Tanya about her unwanted attention to her boyfriend. I don't think I've ever seen Tanya look so scared. Unfortunately, ever since then Tanya has been solely focused on me. I shudder as I recall her latest advances.

My thoughts are interrupted by Jasper banging on the window. He smiles at me, and I motion for him to come in. I give my standard sign off and cue up the last few songs to finish my shift, take off the headphones and hand them over to Jasper. He sets down his coffee and hands me my slurpee.

"It's all yours man," I say before taking a long sip.

Jasper looks at me and shakes his head. "I still don't know how you can drink those things in the morning."

I point to his coffee. "You have your caffeine, I have mine." I take another sip. Nothing beats a Dr. Pepper Slurpee.

"Is Tanya here yet?" I ask, looking around.

"Nope" he said, popping the "p".

"Good, I'm out of here before she can tell me what kind of syrup she wants to lick off me".

Jasper's laughter fills the room as I stroll out of the office, slurpee in hand, and into the early morning. I pause briefly to watch the sunrise from the bridge across the street from the station. It's a good start/end to my day, and I head back to my apartment, pushing back that nagging feeling of incompleteness, and smile.


	3. Chapter 3 Misery

We own nothing all .

All Beta work done by PTB. Thanks So much

**Chapter 3 Misery**

Jake was due home any minute now I was flitting around the kitchen and trying to get supper ready. Bringing the spoon to my mouth, I tasted the pasta. It was perfect. I remember back to a time when I used to love to cook. Jake inhales his food so fast I don't really see a point in making anything special or putting effort in to it. He never notices. I drained the pasta and turned down the sauce to a simmer. Hearing the front door open, I looked up. Jake was home.

"Hey Bells, I'm home." Jake's voice booms thought the apartment; he always feels the need to announce his presences.

He moves to kiss me and I quickly turn my head so he kisses my cheek and not my lips. He frowns slightly at the missed kiss. I turn around to stir the sauce; looking into his eyes only intensifies the guilt I feel.

"Hey, spaghetti is ready and it's on the stove. Dig in."

He starts to drape his arms around my shoulders but I quickly duck out of them. Again he frowns at me and gives me a questioning look. I don't know why he keeps trying. I rarely let him touch me, hoping that he will get that message that I'm trying to push him away.

"You're dirty and I don't want you touching me," _Ever._ I add silently in my head and then curse myself again for being such a coward. "Now go wash up and eat."

He trudges down to the bathroom as I grab myself a plate. I haven't had much of an appetite in so long I can tell I've lost weight. Jake comes back from the bathroom as I'm pushing my food around the plate. He grabs the rest of the spaghetti and sits across from me. I'm pretty sure that he had the fork to his mouth before he was sitting down. Watching Jake eat is like watching a snake eat a hippo-disgusting, but it's hard not to watch. He has sauce everywhere and he's slurping so loudly, I'm even less hungry now than I was before. When he finally comes up for air, all he says is "You gonna eat that?" and points to my plate. I smile and push my plate towards him telling him to "Go ahead I'm full." Thirty second later, he has finished both of our suppers and burps loudly.

"Well Bells, I'm going out," he announces, wiping his face on his sleeve. "Don't wait up."

Cue the smile and the wave and he's out of the door. I take in a deep breath. I always feel like I can breathe easier when he is gone.

Jake goes out a lot. Maybe he can sense how uncomfortable I am with him here or maybe he's just a jerk. It's one or the other; I'm just not sure which. Grabbing the plates from the table, I throw them in the dishwasher. It's only eight o'clock and it's times like these I wish I still had friends or somewhere to go. But I have nothing. God, I'm depressing, aren't I? _Enough with the pity party, it's not going to help or change anything._ I change in to my comfy clothes and grab my laptop. My book was finished months ago, but I still can't help but look it over at least twice a day. Having sent some sample chapter away is making me nervous, I can't help wonder if I missed something, and wondering if anyone but me would ever want to read it. An idea for a second book has been rattling around my head for awhile now, but all I can do right now is just outline it. If the first book is a failure I don't think I'll have it in me to finish a second, and I just can't stand an unfinished story. With a sigh I put my computer down and begin to pick up after Jake, jumpsuit in the hall, and grease covered handprints on the wall_._

I wish I could just shut off my brain for awhile, I would be happier without it. I know I've made bad life choices; I don't need to keep going over them in my head. They play back like a bad song on repeat. Thinking about "what ifs" never did anybody any good, I can't change the past. I can only live in the present and try not to think about the future.

Time seems to crawl by as I stare at the TV, not really watching, just staring. I startle when I hear Jake's truck pulling up. As quick as I can I turn off the TV and dash into my bedroom, shutting the door behind me. I throw on the sweater and pants I sleep in and crawl into bed, taking up as much room as I possibly can. I close my eyes and concentrate on evening out my breathing, when I hear Jake crack open the door.

"Bella?" he whispers in to the room. "Are you awake?"

I make a kind of snoring sound, and roll to take up more room on the bed, hoping he will opt to sleep in his own room tonight. When I hear the shuffling of his clothes I know it's not going to happen. He walks over to the bed and pokes me in the side.

"Bella, baby move over, you're hogging the bed."

I try not to move but all I want to do is scowl at him. It's my bed; I can hog it if I want to. His bed is in his room, why can't he sleep there?

I move slightly and kind of mumble a no; he pokes me again and then just climbs in shoving me over to make room for his hulking frame. He tries to snuggle in to me, but I flip on to my stomach and clutch my pillow. Why can't he take a hint? I don't want him here. I hear him sigh and roll over. Now all that's left is to wait for Jake to fall asleep. When he finally does, I make my escape out to the living room, on to my computer and in to my stories. My radio program is only just beginning so I get to hear the DJ sign on. He has a lovely voice, it's a shame he doesn't say more. Soon the perfect music fills the room and I begin to plot my next book and dream of a better tomorrow.


	4. Chapter 4 I Will Survive

We own nothing all S Meyer.

All beta work done by PTB they rock!

**Chapter 4 I Will Survive**

It was thick, that was a good sign - none of the others had been this thick. How can something so simple be so scary? My mind screamed at me to touch it, but my hands were too shaky to do so. I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths -it was now or never.

This envelope could change everything for me. I'd sent queries to every publisher I could think of to see if any of them were interested in the books I'd spent the last few years writing. I had heard back from four who wanted to take a look at my manuscript. Three of them had already let me know that while my writing style was "adequate", it just wasn't what they were looking for at moment in time. This was my last hope. Letting out the breath I'd been holding I opened the envelope, and quickly scanned the pages inside. They liked it, they really liked it! My eyes began to water and I let out a scream. Meyer Publishing was going to publish my book, I was going to be an author, and I was going to have my name, my face on the back of a book. _Take that, Charlie and Jake! Oh, and while I'm at it- a big "Fuck you" to my high school guidance counselor! _I couldn't remember the last time I had been this happy. I probably reread this letter about ten times, committing it to memory.

I heard the front door open, and Jake walked in. I excitedly showed him my letter.

"Wow, Bells, that's great," he deadpans, throwing his keys on the table, and opening the fridge to get a beer. I can just feel the hurt, and anger of the last few years building up inside of me. He doesn't care.

"That is IT!" I shouted at him. "I show you a letter saying that I'm going to be published, and you don't even care!"

"I said it was great, didn't I?" he fired back.

"You could at least _pretend_ to be excited for me, Jake. This isn't just 'great', this is… wonderful, magical, life-changing, this is my dream come true! All you can muster up for me is a 'that's great'?" I said, mimicking him.

"Fuck, Bella!" he said throwing his hands up the air. "What do you expect, from me? I've had a long day, and all I want to do is shower, grab a beer and watch some TV." He sighed heavily, "Did you at least make me anything for supper?"

All I could do was stare at him, my mouth gaping but no sounds coming out. I have known Jake for a long time - sure, I might kind of hate him now, but I have never been really angry with him before. Until now that is.

"I'll take that as a 'no' then." He grumbled something under this breath before pulling off his greasy coveralls and throwing them on the floor as he headed for the bathroom. Oh no, he was not going to get away with this he cannot just treat me like that, and walk away. I had put up with a lot over the years, but this took the cake. He just stomped all over my happy buzz because he had had a hard day. No offer to celebrate or to take me out, nothing - just 'that's great, where's my supper'. I stomped towards the bathroom and opened the door; I was not going to take this laying down. I walked into the room and flushed the toilet, making the shower water unnaturally hot. I was rewarded for my efforts by a yelping Jake. _Excellent._ I smiled to myself; if he thought this was over he was wrong. I was though taking his shit.

"Fuck Bells, What the hell? I'm trying to take a shower." he said from behind the shower curtain. I reached out and grabbed the curtain, throwing it open.

"That, Jake was for taking my dream and my mood and killing it," I spat at him.

"Oh, for Christ sake. Are you still on that?" he frowns at me. "I'm happy for you, - really I am, but I don't see why you had to go and do this, it wasn't part of our plans."

"Our plans? _Our plans?" _I narrow my eyes at him "What fucking plans are those?" I was yelling now, but I don't think I could have stopped even if I had wanted to; all those years of living a life I didn't want were coming to a boil.

"You know, Bella, marriage, kids. I figured that once you've got all this writing nonsense out of your head, we could settle down, and move back home. I could open up my own garage like I wanted and, you wouldn't have to work, just raise our kids." He looked at me with those big doe eyes of his, but this time I wouldn't be sucked in by them. This was my chance, to stop being a coward and start living.

"No, Jake, those aren't "our" plans, those are _your_ plans. _Yours_! They don't include me, because I don't want that! I never did. I do not love you! I never have. You are my _friend_, and that's all. After all that has happened these last few years I don't know if I can even call you that anymore." By this time tears where streaming down my face. "I don't want to marry you, Jake, and wouldn't want to bring kids into whatever this fucked-up relationship of ours is. You would think the fact that we have never had sex _ever_ would clue you in, but nooo, obviously it hasn't." My face feels hot, it's probably bright red and my throat is getting sore. "I don't love you, Jake." My chest was heaving I was breathing so hard at this point I thought I might pass out. How did I let it get this bad? All I wanted was for everyone I care about to be happy.

"Bella, you don't mean that. The sex thing isn't a big deal, I know you want to wait for marriage and I accept that." He sounded so pitiful, but I could not back down now.

"No, Jake, I mean it. Every word, I can't do this anymore. I'm done. We are _done_" I slammed the door to the bathroom and went running across _my_ apartment, into Jake's room, throwing all his clothes in a duffel bag for him. I couldn't stay one more night in this apartment with him. Since I had nowhere to go and no one to call, I wanted him out now. I threw some of his clothes into bathroom and set the bag by the front door, pacing back and forth waiting for him to come out and face me. Jake didn't come out of the bathroom until about twenty minutes later, looking very confused.

"I packed all your clothes in a bag by the door, you need to leave now." I stated point towards the door.

"Bella, come on, don't be like this." He whined at me like a child.

"I'm not being anything but me, Jake, and I have wanted you out for a long time, I moved here to just be Bella." My voice getting louder that more I have to talk to him. "I didn't invite you. You pushed your way back into my life and now I'm _finally_ pushing back." At times like I really wish my temper wasn't wired to my tear ducts. I don't want him to think I'm crying over him. I'm crying because of him. "Writing is everything to me and to hear you say such selfish things to me about my dream finally coming true – well, it was all I needed hear. Get out, Jake, get out and don't come back unless it's for your things."

"Bella, come on."

"No, I won't 'come on' I don't love and I want you out of my house! I'm done talking to you. Now leave before I say some very hateful things to you I'm sure you don't want to hear."

"Fine, Bella, I'll go; but don't come crying back to me when you realize what a mistake this is. No one will ever love you like I do!"

With that he slammed the door, and I was finally alone. I felt lighter and sick to my stomach all at once. I sank to my knees, and I cried. I cried for all the wasted years, for all the sacrifices, for being such a coward, for all the mistakes made and for losing my best friend. I couldn't believe I had done that. What was Charlie going to say? Where would Jake go? _No_. I had to stop thinking like that; it was what had gotten me in this mess in the first place. I had to start thinking about me, about who Bella Swan was and what she wanted out of life. I reached up for the radio; it was late enough now for my favorite DJ to be on. I heard the tail end of the perfect song to sum up how I was feeling:

_Cause I'm not your princess.__  
__This ain't a fairytale.__  
__I'm gonna find someone some day.__  
__Who might actually treat me well.__  
__This is a big world,__  
__That was a small town__  
__There in my rearview mirror,__  
__disappearing now.__  
__And it's too late for you and your White Horse__  
__To catch me now._

I swear this DJ could read my mind, I had written my entire book to the music he played. It always fit my moods so well, and tonight was no exception. I let out a loud sigh. It was sad that the person that knew me best was a radio DJ who I had never met and didn't even know I existed. DJ Midnight Sun seemed to have a window into my soul; I wished I had a real person I could talk to who knew me as well as he seemed to. I shook all those thoughts out of my head. I was done feeling sorry for myself. Kicking Jake out had only been the first step to putting me first in my life and, I have a lot preparing to do. Walking back to my room, I look at my bed and, know I will be sleeping alone tonight. I stripped down to my underwear and hopped in enjoying the feeling of soft fabric of the sheet against my skin. Tomorrow would be a big day, tomorrow would be a fresh start for me. Tomorrow I was going to start the rest of my life. Smiling I closed my eyes and let the DJ's songs lull me to the first good night of sleep I had had in a very long time.

A/N: This was hard to write I hope you all like how it turned out.


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